Art Colony: Museum Mile Festival

Did you know that today is the Museum Mile Festival????? If you did, don’t gloat about it because no one likes a braggart. If you didn’t, aren’t I so great for letting you know about it? You’re welcome. You can send checks directly to me (just put my first name on the envelope, the post office knows who I am).

I recommend you leave your stuffy apartment and go up there right now (provided that you’re reading this between 6-9pm give or take about 45 minutes for travel time). That’s 23 car-free blocks and free admission to all 9 of the most famous museums in the country included within. To me this seems like a deal that you can’t pass up. Just like that gold selling business that I sent all my gold into. I’m going to get cash for my unused gold! What could possibly go wrong?

Follow the jump for some more information about what to make sure you visit since this thing can be kinda nuts. Just like our sponsor, Almond Joy Candy Bars. Almond Joy: Coconut and Nuts Aren’t A Candy, So We Put Chocolate On It.™

(image via Time Out NY )

Ok First Tip , skip El Museo Del Barrio. They’ve got some crazy thing out in front with kids drawing in chalk on the sidewalk. Who. Cares. That’s not art. That’s kids with chalk drawing on the sidewalk. Look I made a doggie. Thanks de Kooning. Now go pick your nose and pull the hair of the girl that you like.

Second Tip : Go to the top of the Met and see Jeff Koon’s gigantic sculptures. Just do it. The weather might not be great tonight, so it probably won’t be too nuts (brought to you by Almond Joy) and it’s definitely worth checking out.

Third Tip : The Guggenheim (aka. Mr. Gugges) will be completely packed. And that’s fine because the I Want To Believe closed recently. Instead, why not head over to the Conservatory Garden and check out their elaborate gardens and manicured plants. If you’re one of those people who would say, “Plants! Snooze!” I’ll say in response, “you probably shouldn’t have included those exclamation points in that statement, it reads a little strangely.”

Final Tip : Check out the Cooper-Hewitt for some sweet furniture-on-furniture action. It’ll be well worth it.

The Museum Mile Festival
museummilefestival.org
Tuesday, June 3rd 6pm-9pm
Fifth Avenue between 82nd Street and 105th Street.